This Floating Poo Was Way Too Meaningful! These Are the Television Letdowns of the Past Year.

Looking back, we reflect on the TV offerings of the recent year, a handful of series emerge not for their brilliance, but for their spectacular failures. Ranging from cringe-inducing spin-offs to confusingly bad documentaries, here are the programmes that left us scratching our heads or just reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

Where to begin with this divisive spin-off? Burdened with dreadful scripts, painful character development (we demand better for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the show struggled to justify its existence. For a moment, as the final season began, it seemed as if it had at last hit its stride. Then arrived an episode all about Seema’s natural deodorant. Little surprise the creator declared this would be the last season. It concluded on a bum note; the closeup of Miranda’s loo flooded with poo was simply too symbolic. Yet, viewers undeniably found joy dissecting every single “what on earth?” moment. And as Carrie – once again single – twirled around her sprawling townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't release a little sob?

The Kim Kardashian Drama

‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? The answer is a resounding no.’

But that was almost the least of this show's problems. The subject of a exceedingly uncommon no-star review, it was difficult to know where to start enumerating the problems. The laughably leaden dialogue? The tedious glorification of wealth and consumption? The seemingly wilful procession of cliches? Acting so bad they felt almost malicious? Suffice it to say “each and every one” and never speak of this series again. Except, a new season has been commissioned, so we’re probably going to have to.

AKA Charlie Sheen

Considering the legal troubles, domestic violence allegations and fatherly shortcomings, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a troubled figure. Not that you’d really have known it from this three-part documentary which smirked its way at Sheen’s various episodes of self-destructive excess while struggling to tell us a single thing we weren't already aware of. Rather, it felt as if this loose cannon was being pandered to, so any sympathy this show might induce should be reserved for the people who have had to suffer proximity with this charismatic but dismissive narcissist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Of course we understood it was preposterous from the get-go: a thriller about a supercomputer known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or annihilate all of humanity. We stuck with it out of pure love for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had given up trying. One scarcely reacted when his character died, and the other ultimately slicing Charlie with an axe … in super slow-motion. That's what you call giving up the ghost.

MobLand

Dodgy figures convening in empty boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter jackhammering away in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its crime drama back.

In truth, that is unfair on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many look a bit old-fashioned now, but at least they didn’t endure the embarrassment of having to accommodate unconvincing dialects. But there were plenty of other problems. Primarily that it was just profoundly dull; a dispute over drug-selling territory between various cockney picaresques which seemed rather simplistic.

With Love, Meghan

Given the extent to which she grinds the gears of the nation’s ostentatiously angry commentators, it’s temptingly easy to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s various ventures into twee homemaking as intentional provocations. But then you watch them and are forced to admit that in this case, they may have a point. It’s like watching a lifestyle catalogue animated; a meme for wine o’clock with delusions of grandeur; a procession of sleeping dogs, humming beehives, sentimental sayings and forgettable crafting “hacks” you’ll not remember instantly. All supported by immense, mostly unearned wealth. Ugh.

Victoria Beckham

There are obviously interesting things to be said about regarding Victoria Beckham and her journey with vocation, self-image, self-acceptance. But for some reason, this documentary series chose not to say them. Instead, the experience was akin to consuming a marketing brochure. She obviously has good reason to bridle at what she describes as her “miserable cow” image. But sadly, she failed to do herself any helps with this guarded letdown of a series.

The Inheritance

It had the potential to be the next cultural phenomenon – except even camper, with a famous star playing dead and a sharp-tongued personality overseeing her inheritance. What more could you want? As players competed, there was plenty of backstabbing and squabbling. But the rules quickly became incomprehensible: it’s even now too complicated to explain what exactly was happening. Even more disappointingly, we only saw glimpses of the star via filmed videos. The show ended up reeking of a production that was straining desperately to live up to something way beyond it.

Too Much

How do you succeed a show that captured a generation? The pressure was immense for this glitzy romantic comedy about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who arrives in London with a broken heart. The star seized the opportunity by the horns and was joyous to watch, embodying Jane Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very glossy and, ironically, was not enough. Plus, the abundance of famous cameos involved felt icky.

Mitchell & Webb Are Not Helping

Not even good enough to be ‘patchy’.

Given the smart recruitment of talented younger comics, hopes were high. But sadly, most of it fell flat. A particular sketch was a single joke stretched to a husk but repeated in every episode. One star seemed too willing to slip into a well-known ranting mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, in contrast, simply inspired the thought that they should probably have remained in there a while longer.

The Knox Dramatisation

This retelling of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much solely presented the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there undoubtedly is an interesting drama to be made about the tragic 2007 murder, this isn’t it. The subject matter needed to be handled sensitively. Rather, the series struggled painfully to find the right tone, lumbering from oddly jaunty, somewhat stylised farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Complex? Perhaps. A total mess? Absolutely.

Prime Target

We love the lead actor … but did we believe him playing the most brilliant maths genius since, a man so smart he’s on the verge of a breakthrough that could destabilise society? Nope! This international thriller about secret services spying on – and killing off – academics honestly got more farcical by the second. Formulaic nonsense.

1000 Men and Me: The Bonnie Blue Story

This hagiography followed the online personality notorious for sexual exploits as she undertook her most extreme feat yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we wanted was far greater examination of her true psychology, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have interviewed the now-famous mum who showed up to haul her son out of the queue. What we got was disturbing imagery and zero critical analysis of her notoriety whatsoever. It's staggering to consider, the filmmaker has a teenage daughter too.